It Doesn't Often Snow at Christmas

Writers - Tennant/Lowe
First released - 1997
Original album - Elton John's Christmas
Party (various artists)
Producer (original version) - Pet Shop Boys; (2009 version) - Marius De Vries, Pet Shop Boys
Subsequent albums - Christmas (EP); Nightlife 2017 reissue Further Listening 1996-2000 bonus disc; Yes 2017 reissue Further Listening 2008-2010 bonus disc, Smash
Other releases - single/EP (UK #40)

Every year the Pet Shop Boys send a Christmas card to the members of their official fan club. For the 1997 holiday season, instead of a card they sent a gift: a CD featuring a brand-new, otherwise unavailable song. In "It Doesn't Often Snow at Christmas," Neil expresses his tremendous disillusionment over the commercialized spending spree that Christmas has become, symbolized by the fact that—at least in most of Britain—Christmas usually isn't marked by snow. An instrumental version of the song also appears on this "audio Christmas card."

This song remained a much sought-after PSB rarity—largely unavailable outside of unauthorized duplications and online auctions where it could fetch princely sums—until November 2005, when it made an appearance on the limited-edition charity CD Elton John's Christmas Party, a collection of seasonal favorites chosen by Sir Elton himself. But considering the "limited" nature of that release (distributed only through Starbucks and a very few other select outlets) it remained a comparatively obscure item in the Boys' catalog.

In mid-December 2009, the Pet Shop Boys released a new version of this song, co-produced with Marius de Vries, on their Christmas EP. This new, more heavily produced track, with even more "seasonal accoutrements" than the original, features orchestral and choir arrangements by de Vries and Matt Robertson. They've incorporated brief instrumental snippets of the yuletide standards "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" and "Once in Royal David's City." (The particular melodic segments used are quite similar in the two carols, but different enough that it's clear they're both being quoted musically.)

Annotations

One of my site visitors has pointed out that the opening line, "Christmas is not all it's cracked up to be," may employ some punning wordplay in that in the U.K. and many Commonwealth nations "Christmas crackers"—defined by Wikipedia as "festive table decorations that make a snapping sound when pulled open, and often contain a small gift and a joke"—are common elements of the holiday season. (Christmas crackers are not, however, generally used in the United States, which explains why this hadn't occurred to me; to be honest, in fact, I had never even heard of them before.) Of course, this line also uses the idiomatic expression "cracked up to be," which in both British and American English is used to refer informally to the common reputation of something or someone. It's most often used negatively, as it is in this song. In other words, something that's not what it's cracked up to be doesn't live up to its reputation.
"Bing Crosby, are you listening to me?" – American popular singer Bing Crosby (1903-1977) was one of the most popular and influential vocalists in the history of popular music. (Before Bing, most recorded vocalists stood back before the microphone and belted out the song as if they were singing in front of a live audience. Crosby certainly wasn't the first to take advantage of the microphone's ability to capture a quieter, more intimate style of singing, but he was the first to sustain tremendous popularity with this newer, highly "personal" approach to recorded vocals.) He was also the first big "multimedia star," equally successful in records, radio, and film. His 1942 hit, the Irving Berlin composition “White Christmas”—to which the PSB Christmas song stands in lyrical contrast; Bing has high hopes of a white Christmas, whereas Neil doesn't think it very likely—is the best-selling single of all time, having sold through the years more than 50 million copies (and more than 100 million if you also count the albums on which it's found).
As noted above, the new 2009 version of "It Doesn't Often Snow at Christmas" incorporates brief instrumental segments of the carols "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" and "Once in Royal David's City," the melodies of which were written by German composer Felix Mendelssohn and British composer Henry Gauntlett, respectively.
"What is this year's festive Number One?" – Unlike in the United States, there's a long tradition in Britain of making special note of which song tops the pop chart at Christmas. The Boys themselves can claim this distinction by virtue of their deceptively festive 1987 rendition of "Always on My Mind."

Mixes/Versions

Officially released

Mixer: unknown
- Vocal (4:02)
  - Available as on exclusive CD sent as a "Christmas card" in 1997 to PSB Fan Club members, on the 2005 compilation CD Elton John's Christmas Party, and for listening at one time as an "exclusive track" on the official PSB website

Instrumental (4:00)
2017 Remastered Version (3:56)
- On one of the "Further Listening" bonus discs accompanying the 2017 Nightlife reissue

Mixer: Andy Bradfield (assisted by Mo Hausler and Izzy Morley)
- New Version (3:54)
  - Available on the Christmas EP and one of the Yes 2017 reissue Further Listening 2008-2010 bonus discs

Official but unreleased

Mixer: unknown
- "Radio Mix 2" (aka "The No Greetings Mix") (4:01)

List cross-references

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